#100peoplepoems part 78: Eddie

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May 31, 2016 by Sez

Went to see Eddie Izzard do his pro remaining in Europe comedy. Talking to the bloke in the door was a rather anticlimactic end to the night.


The guy who checked our tickets

Wants out of Europe.

He decided this in 1981

(Around the time

When you were deciding

To leave Sheffield

To be a comedian.)

He said enjoyed the show

But no amount of trilingual Surrealist comedy

No human sacrifice,

No email from the Almighty

No dogs on the heads of royalists

No millionaire moles in Beverly Hills

Were ever going to budge a belief

Almost as old as me

(And, bafflingly, about a decade older 

Than the European Union itself).

Eddie, I’m sorry:

You were only the second weirdest person 

In the house.


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